Needing more self-control? 

 I don’t like to make commitments.  Perhaps I should try to seek more self-control in my life.  I could cut down on screen time, exercise more and eat all those green leafy veggies.   Perhaps just one more cookie! 

Many people think that most of our problems are the lack of self-control.  But self- control is a misnomer and when we focus too much on it, we are setting ourselves up for failure.  The problem with self-control is that it means my self is in control and that’s the last thing I want.  What I really want is to be less self-focused, not more.  The time I spend struggling with myself not to eat a cookie is the time and energy that could have been put to better use.  I don’t’ want to spend my life getting into fights with cookies.  I have other things to do. 

Usually when we are motivated to change a character trait, it is because we hope to enhance ourselves somehow; to be successful at work, to have a healthier body, to be respected and admired by others.  At the root of the motivation is what is good for me.  I want to be a better person.  I want to feel successful, fulfilled, perfected. 

Our Lord, Jeshua (Jesus) always preached renewing one’s heart. Kindness, gentleness; goodness toward others.  He knew us and how we want to be in control of everything.  He emphasized the shift from a more self-centered life to a more Godly one.  Self-perfection is the not the goal.  Our purpose in building character is not to be more successful or accomplished but to become the person that God wants us to be.    

Rabbi Paul used the term of self-control in many of his letters. ( Gal. 5:23; 1^st Cor. 7:5; 2 Tim. 3:3).  These were written mostly to Gentile converts who had a lust for many of their pagan lifestyles.  Once they became believers, he expected them to gain control over their former lusts.   He wanted their lives to be controlled by their newfound Messiah. 

We find ourselves wanting a closer relationship to God, but our worldly desires keep dragging us down.  We keep pushing away the same negative thoughts dozens of times….. but perhaps each time helps us to be more dependent on God and less on ourselves!!!!  That would bring Him pleasure.  A stronger relationship with Him.

                                          Less self-control means more God control!